Childbirth, as miraculous natural as it may be, is a bitch. It’s arguably one of the most dangerous things a woman can do, and one’s body takes its time going back to normal. And so, it’s little wonder that many of us were impressed with the Duchess of Cambridge’s turnaround time last Saturday.
According to a group of women in Russia, however, there is no way Catherine was able to walk out of the Lindo Wing and show off her newborn daughter wearing a yellow and white dress.
Russian newspaper Komsomolskaya Pravda featured comments submitted by female readers who had serious doubts about the timeline of events surrounding Princess Charlotte‘s birth.
The readers claimed it was “impossible” for Catherine to give birth at 8:34am and walk out of the hospital a mere ten hours later looking as radiant as she did.
“If she really gave birth naturally, it was surely some days ago,” one women wrote, according to the Daily Mirror. “She gave birth three days ago. They reported it only now. Look at the baby – she does not look like a newborn at all.”
Another pointed out that “there is nothing which would help a woman, even if she gave birth with the help of best doctors, stand up five hours after giving birth – and leave the clinic on her feet.”
Some other doozies from the article:
1. “It was a surrogate mother who gave birth but not her. Kate must have been wearing a fake belly showing to the people that she was pregnant.”
2. “She gave birth three days ago. They reported it only now. Look at the baby – she does not look like a newborn at all.”
3. “It is just not real to walk yourself several hours after birth and wave to the public in white dress.”
4. “If you ever gave birth, try to recall yourself in three or four hours later.”
5. “Even if the birth was easy, women just want to sleep and sleep for several hours. This is a fairy tale of a family of show offs.”
6. “There is no special maternal look in her eyes – this natural thing is not visible. Look at Diana. This Kate is just an actress from Buckingham Palace theatre. She never gave birth!.
7. “That the baby is at least 7-10 days old.”
8. “First of all, she is too big for a newborn, and secondly, the face is smooth and pale.”
9. “I probably could have gone out that day and given a little wave.” – my mom
Nothing spells out sisterhood solidarity like a bunch of random Russian women throwing accusations at a new mom. I have but one thing to say to you broads…