Good evening and welcome to the ninth anniversary of the best day of my life. There was never a time in recent history as magnificent as that Friday, when Catherine Elizabeth Middleton walked gracefully through a tented tunnel that connected the Goring Hotel to a waiting Rolls Royce — nay — a page in British history.
The soon-to-be former commoner sat next to her father, Michael as she waved to throngs of screaming well-wishers before arriving at Westminster Abbey’s west door. As she stepped out of the vehicle, the House of Alexander McQueen confirmed that their creative director, Sarah Burton, had designed the future Queen Consort’s wedding gown.
Inside the Abbey, Michael (who looked so nervous, bless his heart) walked his eldest daughter down the aisle to Parry’s “I was Glad.” At the altar, Catherine was greeted by William and a smirking, hello-lemme-charm-yer-pants-off Harry.
Both boys looked handsome as he*k, and there wasn’t one person watching the ceremony — be it there or at home — who wasn’t thinking to themselves, “I wish their mum were here to see this.”
The day went off without a hitch. There was banter about silly hats (as is to be expected at British weddings), a member of the clergy was caught doing a cartwheel on camera after the ceremony (what a lark!) and there was a wonderful send-off starring Will and Kate in one of Prince Charles’ vintage cars. It was a helluva day, kids.